50 Things I’ve Learned In Australia

1. Melbourne is pronounced Melburn and not Mel-boorne. You WILL be corrected on that!

2. Bogan is slang for white trash/hillbillies.

3. There are heaps of Irish here!

4. On that note there are a lot of French as well.

5. Tomato sauce is ketchup, so it’s ok if someone offers to put some on your fries.

6. Rice Krispies are referred to as Rice Bubbles here.

7. They have drive through bottle shops (liquor stores) here which kicks ass.

8. Thongs go on your feet and not on your privates.

The Australian breakfast of champions!

9. Vegemite is meant to be spread on toast, not eaten by itself.

10. Goon refers to a 4L box of wine you can purchase for $10 here in Australia. It tastes like ass and will give you a nasty hangover!

11. NOBODY drinks fosters here... The commercials we saw in North America were lies!

12. The national colours are green and gold.

13. JB HI-FI is the equivalent of Future Shop/Best Buy.

14. Nobody here eats kangaroo, but it’s a nice lean meat and pretty tasty. It can be a little tough so make sure you cook it right!

15. The sun here is STRONG! Always wear sunscreen and try to wear a hat.

16. Green peppers are referred to as capsicum here. So when you order your pizza or pasta and you’re expecting something new and exotic, don’t get your hopes up!

17. If you’re a guy and you like short-shorts, you’ll LOVE Australia!

18. Women here actually like to dress up to go out (and by dress up I mean an actual dress and heels). Sadly it’s getting quite rare to see this back home.

19. I’ve spoken French every day here in Melbourne due to the number of Frenchmen here. On that note they HATE our accent and some seem to have trouble understanding it.

20. Don’t use Greyhounds here in Oz, find out why in The Australian Toilet Experience.

21. Coolers (the ones we stick beer and food in) are referred to as eskis here.

22. Dick Smith Electronics is the equivalent of Radio Shack/The Source.

23. Tomato sauce does NOT go on pasta... PASTA sauce goes on pasta.

24. Rock melons are cantaloupe.

25. Pints in this country are overpriced sitting around the $10 range. Schooners (473mL) are your best bet.

26. On that same note there’s no standardized beer size names so a schooner can mean a different thing in a different state.

27. ALDI is a lifesaver if you’re on a shoestring budget, cheap groceries and beer!

28. Bars here are referred to as hotels. So you’ll see a LOT of hotels when walking about the city, but not all of them necessarily have accommodation.

29. Brothels are LEGAL in Australia. There’s actually one up for sale down the road where I live with a BIG sign “BROTHEL FOR SALE.”

30. Never ask for a “bathroom,” ask for a “toilet.” Restaurants and bars might tell you they don’t have a “bathroom” as they’ll think you’re looking to take a bath/shower.

31. There’s no such thing as a double-double here in Australia.

32. The meat pies here are amazing!

33. For some reason it seems that the smaller the coin here in Australia the more it’s worth. The $2 coin is the smallest whereas the 50c coin is massive!

34. Just like traffic drives on the left, everyone walks on the left, stands on the escalator to the left etc. After being here a while you will be able to point out the tourists.

35. VB is bogan beer, don’t be caught drinking it!

36. The flies here are annoying as hell, they go straight for your mouth, eyes, or nostrils. You will at some point slap yourself if you’re staying out in the bush.

37. Australia has some really weird TV shows. For example: Please Marry My Boy where mums go on national TV to try and find their beta sons a wife.

38. Holden cars = GM cars

39. Porterhouse steaks here are striploin steaks in North America. Regardless you can find some $12 porterhouse steak specials at certain bars which is still a great deal.

40. You will barely meet any Australians if you’re doing the hostelling thing down here.

41. Almost every industry here is regulated to death, and if not has some government agency sticking it’s nose into it. I would probably never open a business here.

42. You will sign A LOT of waivers here. I had to sign one to go on a pub crawl with a hostel here once.

43. The Axe line of men’s products is called Lynx here.

44. Melbourne loves its footy while Sydney tends to prefer rugby.

45. They do have a basketball league here in Oz (The NBL) and it’s still pretty big.

46. A lot of downtown restaurants and cafes won’t have a toilet in them, be warned!

47. People here refer to downtown as the CBD (Central Business District).

48. They don’t do 12-packs of beer here in Australia.

49. Subway here offers guacamole and pineapple as toppings!

Happy Australia Day mates!

50. Happy Australia Day, January 26!