A Regular Coffee - Is It That Complicated?

So I’ve made it here in Australia which is fantastic. It is nice being in a country where I understand everything around me. While in Korea for example I needed moisturizer BADLY for my hands (no gloves and winter cold dried them up to a nice red cracked color) I was scared away from going into the pharmacy as all the products were in Korean. That’s one of the wonders of being here in an English speaking country. But don’t be fooled, everything is not like it is back home! Simple things such as crossing the street were a struggle for me after arriving as cars here drive on the left. It took so much work just to make sure I look right first THEN left. It’s some of the small things like these that kind of get to you at first. You get frustrated when simple things such as crossing the road feel like university level calculus to get used to. I’m sure when I get behind the wheel it’ll probably be as bad as rocket science.

The biggest gripe I have right now here in Melbs is coffee. Honestly I just want a regular cup of joe like back home served double-double, is that too hard to ask? Ordering coffee here is a pain in the ass as whenever I get up to the counter and ask for a coffee it seems like we have to go through this complex mathematical equation just to get something remotely good.

My first experience here in Melbs was last Thursday. I was at my orientation meeting for my working holiday program which was fantastic, also got to do it in French as it was a Frenchman giving it to me and I was the only one (Francophonie en Australie? Moi je dit oui!). At break time I went downstairs to get myself a coffee as I was dying for one. I get down there and it’s a mildly fancy coffee shop. I go up to the counter and ask for a small coffee. “What kind of coffee?” Ok fine Americano. “You sure about that?” Yeah. “Milk or Cream?” I can’t do that myself? “We do it for you” 2 sugars too? (gives me a dirty look). “Takeaway or for here” Takeaway. 5min later I finally get my coffee, which to be honest wasn’t that great and for $4 this is ridiculous.

Fast forward to yesterday, I step into McD’s for breakfast and all I want with my hotcakes is a damn coffee double-double. My order was going fine up until coffee was mentionned... I want a Medium coffee with that. “Will that be a cappucino?” No just a regular coffee “A black coffee sir?” Yeah sure but could I get 2 creams and 2 sugars with that? “Sorry sir we don’t have cream here” Fine milk will do. My coffee comes back all full of froth on top, sigh...

My Medium flat white, which cost me AUD$3.70

I’ve made it over to another McD’s (Macca’s here - pronounced Mackers) and I’m having a cappucino as I didn’t feel like struggling again. People look at me like a mad man when I order my coffee. Honestly forget about regular North American coffee over here, even 7-Eleven has a F@!#ing barista in it. No joke there. My Canadian friends here have recommended that I go for a flat white, saying that it's as close as I'll get to what was back home. It's ok but there's still milk froth on the top which I hate! Hopefully at some point I’ll be able to get a regular cup of coffee, in the mean time I guess I’ll put up with all this pretentious coffee...